Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Not Just Damaged Goods: A post I have to share.

The below is taken form Barefooted Soeur it is so very true, read and be blessed :)

Not just damaged goods.

Been through a breakup? two?

There seems to be a misconception going around in the courtship circles that is weighing on my heart tonight. The idea that the first person you begin to bond with must be the one, or else you will be left with only broken pieces of a heart to offer on your wedding day, and emotionally impure.

I believed that because that's what everyone else believed, that's what the books say.  Articles, sermons, you name it, everyone said it so it must be true.

And then the unthinkable happened, and I had to go through breakups along side all the rest of the imperfect people in the world, and you know what? my perspective changed. I had to look that thought line square in the face and deal with it. Was all I had left to give a torn heart because I let someone in emotionally?

Am I just damaged goods now?

I don't find that in scripture.

I'm not saying that it isn't wonderful if the first person that you meet is "the one", I adore love stories like that. And I am not saying that we should not be careful to guard our hearts and the hearts of our brothers and sisters, and to strive with all diligence to be pure. Yes we should!
And sometimes breakups happen.
You can do everything to try to be sure you are doing it right and even feel sure that you are seeing tangible 'yess' from God, and then suddenly all you hear from Him is 'no'.
People say it must not have ever been His will then, but I wonder about that.

Every single one of us have certain things we need to learn to prepare us for what we will face in life, and some of us need to learn things that they can only learn through a breakup.  And that is something that hurts in it's own special way.
Overwhelming days when your heart feels like a burning city, endless nights when the tearing feeling wakes you up as soon as your hopeless thoughts wander into the hazy forest of sleep.
But I honestly believe that I have grown in ways I could not have otherwise, and I saw things in myself that I wouldn't have known needed to change if they had not been brought out.

And if you have been there too I just want to say; you are not just damaged goods.

You are a warrior learning to fight in the battle of life, and life isn't clean and perfect for any one of us.
You are not less than, and you don't have only pieces of your heart to give on your wedding day. You may have scars but you know what? we all do.

To be honest, we are all just broken pieces to start with anyway, whether or not we went through a breakup of some kind.

I laid my broken heart before the Father and He did make it whole again. He is the only one who can and He is the only one who can truly fill it.
And from what I hear there is pain and bleeding hearts in the process of any to lives welding together as one. I also hear the end result can be more than worth it.

My conclusion? Just because you have gone through some kind of breakup doesn't mean you are hopeless, and it doesn't mean you have any less to offer on your wedding day than someone who never went through one. You may just have gone through the exact valley that you needed to to prepare you for the rest of your life, and even your future spouse.


3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hey... it has been a while since I visited your blog :) (we moved to a different state etc. been busy) but I finally got caught up and I enjoyed this post. Thanks for sharing!

Flame of Jah said...

Thanks for the comment Brytni, I am glad you liked this post :)

Unknown said...

Hi, I just came across your profile on HSA and thought I'd check out your blog as well. I appreciated this post. I could relate to it and it was encouraging to read.